I didn't meet my biological "father" until I was 24, after I had my son.
My Mom remarried when I was 10 to a wonderful man whom I call Dad- and actually forget that he is not "biological" Dad.
By the time My mom married my Dad- all of the "programming" was done. All of the ways that I got my needs met were already ingrained in my unconscious BEing.
All of my attachment styles.
All of my perceptions on relationships
all of my insecurities around men
All of my abandonment "wounds"
My belief systems
All. Of. Them. Were already there.
What I feel a lot of us fail to recognize(by no fault of our own) is the years that we don't "remember" are exactly the years where the core of who we are in society are formed.
Our Identity is formed around how we are or are not interacted with as a child that relies heavily on "the other".
The biggest fragmentation, our deepest cuts happen in the stages of life where we do not recall.
This is why, for me, it has been absolutely necessary to look at the historical patterns of my family.
To begin to learn how to rewire and heal my perceptions.
It is fascinating to me, because although you may read I didn't have a bio father ( and yes this has been HUGE wounding) I feel deep within my soul- this is part of "my contracts" . It all fits so perfectly.
My bio. Father wasn't "meant to" be in my life- I was only meant to carry on the genes of his ancestors, to heal and stop this patterning.
One of the most emotional times in my life ( and I still get teary) is having My Dad and Biological Fahter meet- My Bio father thanked My Dad for being there when he couldn't.
As I look back on those moments, I am blessed with Immense gratitude and purpose.
My wish is that you are able to gain clarity in your present reality from looking into past circumstances.